Monday, October 29, 2007

Two Wins in Four Years?? Pinch Me....

Yes my beloved Sox, or Saawwx if you're in the immediate Bahstin area... have won the World Series!! Again! Two times in four years! Hard to imagine seeing as how they went on an 86 year drought until the 'curse' was broken in 2004. I only have this pic because it was the only one I was allowed to 'save as' from Apparently they are afraid I will save and then print all their photos, sell them and make a gazillion dollars and overthrow Bill Gates as the world's richest man. Hrrmmpphh..
I did get to see the game form the third inning on last night. I was battling to stay awake let me tell ya'. But I managed. The Boys from Bahhstin have done it again and it makes my little heart happy.
I kept Mags awake on more than one night watching the games but she's happy for me.
Thank's guys. You've thrilled the good folks of RedSox Nation. You all played hard and truly deserve the big win. Enjoy your winter and see you in the spring.

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

The Red Sox Are Trying to Kill Me

Yes. It's true. Two trips to the World Series in the last four years. This is certainly enought to ruin the good cardiac well-being of people in New England. I have been following the Sox since I was a wee lad and have had my share of heartbreak, like my forefathers before me. We are all Sox fans. Everyone in my family. My grandfather was especially loyal. I found out just how loyal one day when I said, in jest of course, that maybe the Yankees would take it all. He looked down over the tops of his horn-rimmed glasses and in a flash of snow-white hair and plaid flannel; I had a leather belt across my arse and spent the next two hours tied to the swing set in his backyard. In the rain.
And as I was watching game 7 the other night and as Dice-K was starting to wean in the fifth. I found myself twisting my head away as though I were about to witness a horrible car accident, muttering the words of my grandfather "Jesus Mary and Joseph..." followed quickly by "God forgive me..." Yes this is what the RedSox organization did to this Irish-Catholic church going man. Over the years they wear you down. But it seems lately the times they are a' changin'. The World Series win in '04 almost killed me. I spent every night up 'til past midnight watching my heroes win game after game. Usually in agony waiting until the final out. Thankfully Maggie was standing by with the paddles. Now they are doing it again. Down 3-0 to a decent Indians club, they rally back to win 3 straight. My little heart can't take this. So now we wait and see what develops in the coming week. A second Championship in Boston in four years? I'm glad I've got my will written.

Friday, October 19, 2007


Another work week is in the books, thankfully. And now it's time to kick back. Hopefully. Work is a zoo lately. I have been doing alot of heavy lifting. Not that I'm complaining mind you. I don't mind working hard. But lately, it's killing me man. I'm lifting bags of mail that range in weight form 45-60 pounds. It might not sound heavy to you big dudes out there but man, that 60 pound bag is half my body weight! Plus my back isn't so good. I've got two steel bars screwed to my spine form way back when spinal surgery was still in it's early days. So the question on your mind is probably 'Why haven't you ever had it fixed you crazy little bastard?' Well I'll tell you you nosey fucker. Spinal surgery is risky surgery. And it gets more so as you get older. And seeing I'm nearing 40 I'm not hot on the idea of being cut open again. Sue me. I told my Orthopedic surgeon as long as there's no chance the broken piece will come dislodged and skewer my intestines or come poking out my skin, it's staying as is. But I digress.
Work is a zoo but starting next Friday and for all but the last two Fridays of the year, I will be enjoying having every Friday for the rest of the year off. I chose Fridays because whilst Mondays suck like a nine-dollar vacuum cleaner, the biggest chance for idiocy occurs on Fridays in my place of employment. So hopefully, I'm dodging all of it. Or most of it. The benefits of PTO days. Sweet.

Monday, October 15, 2007

Fire. The Word You Want is Fire.

So I'm at work the other day and I'm working on a Scitex. It's a hi-speed ink jet printer. There is a conveyor belt & the piece I'm printing runs along and then it passes under a heater, to dry the ink. Sometimes we get some super glossy material. This means the heater has to be super hot and the piece has to be passed under the heater at a very low speed. So's the ink will dry properly. Okay, now...the glossy material is more likely to..well..burst into flames if it is under the heater too long.
Now that you know all that crap...If for any reason the envelope gets stuck under the heater for more than like, three seconds, it will go up like Michael Jackson's afro in the Pepsi Commercial. On this day I had my back to the machine when my co-worker Rosie, an older woman who handles all our paper work is passing by and suddenly she starts making this noise...."Oooooh!! oooohhhh! UUmmmm Hey!!Ummmm.. Connor!"
I turn to see three envelopes engulfed in flames on my conveyor belt. I roll my eyes and calmly shut the machine down. I then walk over, open the lid to our fire-bucket and then I grab the tiny edge of the one envelope that isn't on fire and drop all the flaming material into the bucket. I look at Rosie and say "That's a fire Rosie."
"Smart ass"

Saturday, October 13, 2007

Paging Mrs. FancyPants

Okay so last night we went to our local Toyota dealership to see about a left over Matrix. 2007 loaded, yadda yadda. Only like17k. On the way there my wife lays down some rules about buying a new car. She says one thing you must never do is drive the car and then tell the salesman "I love it!" as that sets off the 'sucker-born-every-minute' alarm in dealers. Well we get there and that car we were going to look at has been sold. Paul Leahy, our salesman sees Maggie checkin' out a '07 Camry. It is a sweet car. She hemms and haws and bites her lower lip. Paul gets the key and tells us take it for a ride. Well, we do. The car is hot. Rides like a big ol' Caddy. Smooth as butter. After a few miles the missus let's me jump in the driver's seat. Buckle up Miss Daisy. I pull out into the road and romp on the gas. The car shot foward and it handled sooo very nicely. The brakes are really good too, by the way.
Folks, for the money this car is a fabulous value. It is a luxury car.Plus it was MotorTrends car of the year and it is one of the safest cars on the road.
So we get back and Paul says to my wife "how do ya' like it?" and my wife, who briefed me on using my best poker face blurts out "Holy Crap I would give my left kidney for this car!" Well, that may be a slight exageration but it was close.
So we go in and haggle for over an hour. Finally the 'sales manager' comes over and says he's gonna call Tanaka in Japan and see if they can let us go any lower. Well, it must've been a good day in the land of the rising sun because when he came back he had taken another k off the price. I wanted two thousand more off but hey a grand is a grand. So Mags signed all the paperwork and drove home in a new Camry.
Mag says she feels guilty because her intent was to get me a new car. I tell her all the time a new car doesn't thrill me. I'm gonna sell my Tacoma and start driving the older Camry.
So it was a good night overall. Plus the Sox took game 1 of the ALCS over the Indians.

Tuesday, October 9, 2007

That's It..I'm Moving To Canada...

Below is a story a friend E-mailed me from her township newspaper. You will crap yourself when you read it. The newspaper story is in italics.
PUYALLUP - "Let them have their 30 minutes of dressing goofy and having candy," said Silas Macon on the grounds of Puyallup's Maplewood Elementary School Wednesday afternoon.
He'd just learned the grade school tradition of a party and parade in costume during the last half-hour of class before Halloween night won't happen this year in the Puyallup School District for his two daughters.
The superintendent has cancelled all Halloween activities.
A letter sent home to parents Wednesday states there will be no observance of Halloween in the entire school district.
"We really want to make sure we're using all of our time in the best interest of our students," explained Puyallup School District spokesperson Karen Hansen.
Hansen says the superintendent made the decision for three primary reasons. First, Halloween parties and parades waste valuable classroom time. (bullshit. they're kids. let them have a little fun) In addition some families can't afford costumes.
It's the third reason some Puyallup parents are
The district says Halloween celebrations and children dressed in Halloween costumes might be offensive to real witches.
"Witches with pointy noses and things like that are not respective symbols of the Wiccan religion and so we want to be respectful of that," said Hansen.

The Wiccan, or Pagan, religion is growing in the U.S. and there are Wiccan groups in Puyallup.
What the sweet crap is going on in this country? Okay I get the reason of some kids can't afford costumes. It sucks to be poor and see some rich kid in a kick-ass costume and you're wearing the sheet that was on your bed this morning. But really. Offending witches by dressing like...well...witches? I'm serious. This is a real article.
I would think Wiccans would have bigger things to worry about. Really. Isn't there a world-wide 'eye of newt' shortage? Or maybe the 'Cauldron' has run out of 'dust of bat cock'? Bigger things are going on in the world folks. It's tradition. Wiccans and Pagans and Witches have been around for centuries. Little girls have been dressing like witches for years and years and now the school board is taking action? Let's focus on filling their little brains with knowledge instead of idiocy. That's what the school is for. If witches, Wiccans, are that upset. Let them call the pantie-waists at the ACLU and file suit against Hollywood. Or the music industry! That's a veritable gold-mine! Check it out.
The Eagles wrote 'Witchy Woman'. Right away you've got a case. They didn't even try to hide it. It's about a witch. Here are some lyrics and their very clear insinuations in parenthesis. You could bring up in your suit. Check it out......'Ruby lips & groovy hips...' (whore). 'Sparks fly from her fingertips....' (pyromaniac) and one more 'See how high she flies...' (meth addict).
Don't even get me going on 'Black Magic Woman' or 'Season of the Witch'...mercy me...
If that doesn't work for you, you can sue MGM. The Wicked Witch of the West in 'Wizard of Oz'??? Man if that's not a slanderous portrayal of a witch I don't know what is....That Gulch woman was a really bad looking witch. Yessirree.
Now I really don't have a problem with any Wiccans. Really. I don't care who or what you worship. If you pray to the birdbath, good for you. But to take away a years-old tradition from a bunch of little kids ? Come on.
Before I end this rant I want anyone who reads this rag to think of one thing. The school district is forgoing a Halloween celebration because they don't want to offend any real witches. aka Wiccans. Okay? Now....
Consider this. The slick headed, ignorant hate-mongers at the KKK have a right under the Constitution of the United States of America, to assemble in PUBLIC (like the schools) and yell into bullhorns about how awful our African-American citizens are. They can screamit into the faces of black folks and they carry on and spew pure ignorance-based HATRED into the air. They have a parade. They burn crosses. gets better..there is often a police detail assigned to these events to protect the skinheads. And little kids can't dress up like witches in school? Nice.
Welcome to America.

Saturday, October 6, 2007

I Hope She Spilled Her Coffee

So I'm driving to work the other morning. I pass a small farm or two, a couple of schools and the other stuff you see on your way to work. I come into town and slow for the traffic that's slowly building. There is a red light ahead and traffic is backed up abut ten or so cars. Since the light is red, a Good Samaritan in front of me is letting folks coming from the opposite direction make left turns. It's a nice gesture and since the light is red and I'm going nowhere I don't care. Hell, I would do the same thing. So the light turns green and our Good Samaritan waves one more car through. I start forward and a large dump truck turns hard and fast in front of me. I slow not wanting to become the new hood ornament for a twelve-ton dump truck. I tap the gas to head forward and a woman in a tiny white lowgasusgaelowemissionssavetheplanetimwearingmyfavoriteBerkenstockstodaybatteryoperatedwindup car decides she will pull the same crap. She slows down and gives me a smirk. I grin and romp on the gas pedal of my Fill'erupjackrompingonshrubberyandspewinggravelhirisewithbiggiantoffroadtires15mpgToyoatTacoma and the tires screech and the truck lurches forward like a rooster being hit the arse with acattle-prod. Her smirk is quickly replaced by a look of 'holy crap!'. I slow the truck as quickly as I raced ahead and I'm sure I had at least 6 inches between her rear fender and my front bumper. I catch her giving a quick glimpse in her rear view mirror as she putters her way to work. I smile to myself and turn up the radio.

Wednesday, October 3, 2007

Stevie Ray Vaughan - Texas Flood

Remembering Stevie

Today would have been blues great Stevie Ray Vaugn's 53rd birthday. Stevie is and has been one of favorite musicians for a very long time. Ever since I first heard him tearing through the opening of 'Couldn't Stand the Weather' on his Texas Flood cd I was hooked. I eventually compiled his cd's and a nice box set with DVD Maggie gave me last year.
Vaughan's blues style was strongly influenced by many blues guitarists. Foremost among them were Albert King, who dubbed himself Stevie's "godfather", Otis Rush, Buddy Guy, and Jimi Hendrix & Lightnin' Hopkins. He was also strongly influenced by early blues-rock guitarist Lonnie Mack.
And, I'm not sure if many people know this, but Stevie played on the David Bowie song "Let's Dance".
Stevie was killed in a helicopter crash on August 25th 199o just outside of East Troy, Wisconsin. He had just finished performing with other guitar greats Eric Clapton, Buddy Guy and Robert Cray. He took the remaining seat on a Bell helicopter, actually asking his brother Jimmie if he could have it.
Sadly he had just recovered from a drug and alcohol addiction a few years earlier. There are alot of things that could be said about the bluesman, but really, his music says it all. Here is a link to the Wikipidea entry on Stevie and a list of his works. If you like guitar music and have never heard Stevie play, do yourself a favor and check him out.

Tuesday, October 2, 2007

The Three Scariest Words.....

to the rest of the NFL. "Brady to Moss..."