Monday, January 21, 2008

Million Dollar Bill

Im Tired Because I'm Overworked and I Can Prove It

The population of this country is 300 million. 130 million are retired. That leaves 170 million to do the work. There are 90 million in school, which leaves 80 million to do the work. Of this there are 39 million employed by the Federal Government, leaving 41 million people to do the work. 4 million are in the Armed Forces, leaving 37 million to do the work. Take from that, the total of 34 million who work for state and city governments & that leaves 3 million people to do the work. At any given time, there are 188,000 people in hospitals, leaving 2,212,000 people to do the work. Now there are 2,211,998 in prisons.

That leaves just two people to do the work. You and me.

And you're sitting at your computer reading my fucking blog.


Thursday, January 17, 2008

Say Auugghhhhhh

Okay so I took the day off. Again. I was feeling like crap agian last night and when I awoke this morning I had the feeling that there was a tiny little dwarf in my head and he was trying to dig out with an ice-pick. A very, very sharp ice-pick. So my lovely wife suggests I stay home. To quote her 'that's why you have sick days.' Well she needed twist my arm. I got up at around 630 and called in. Or out. Whatever.
I tried to get in to see my doc and of course there was nothing available. I was told, however, that I could see a nurse at 1. I ran this by Maggie and she said "are you burning up with fever little man?! See if you can get an appointment with a doctor in another office." So I call back and request a doctor and am told I could see Dr. Hanna at 10. This makes us both feel better and I drive over to the Medical Arts Building, whixh is connected to CentraState Hospital in Freehold. This place is really nice. There are many wings and the doc's office is in one of them. Walking into this doctors office is a pleasant surprise. Big comfortable chairs, nice lighting, big heavy oak tables, nice lighting... Compared to the office I usually go to which is basically a crack den with a fake plant and a receptionist. But I digress.
I saw a young woman named doctor Hanna who, after listening to my plight, deduced that last week I had a viral infection which knocked out my immune system, thus allowing the rampaging sinus infection I currently posses.
She gave me a script and a sample of Nasonex, and recommended lots of fluids and lots of rest. So I fill my script and come home. I have a cup of tea and then..surprise, crawl back into bed and sleep for a few hours. I can't wait for this shit to clear up. I hate feeling like this. I'm completely worn down. Mags suggested I take tomorrow off and tehn I ahve the weekend to recoup. I initially tell her I'm going to wait to see how I feel in the mornign but I'm now leaning towards taking tomorrow off.

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Have You Seen Me??

Yeah it's been a while. I always start a blog like a house on fire and then it tapers. I get bored easily, what can I say. Plus most nights I haven't the energy to sit in front of a computer and blab about my life. So here is a concise update on the goings on.
The Patriots are like 17-0, they are going into this weekends game with Stan Diego feeling pretty good about themselves I'm sure. And why wouldn't they? I'm not a Giants fan but I am happy for my buddies at work. Giants fans both, they are nice guys and deserve to have their favorite team in the playoffs. Sadly, if we meet again in the Super Bowl, the Patriots will beat them like a rented mule. Sorry guys.
Last Tuesday I took a sick day. It was weird because, well....I don't get sick. really. I have the constitution of a Yak and when I take a PTO day it is for no other reason than I simply need a day away form the idiocy that is 'BigConglomorate Shipping'. I get 25 PTO days per year and used approximately 3 because I was sick or unable to work. If I do call out it is because my back is killing me and I couldn't go anyways. But mostly I just need a 'Mental Health Day'. But I digress.
Tuesday I stayed home and relaxed. The beginnings of the Head Cold that ate Memphis had decided I would be his next victim. Fool that I am, I decided on Weds. that I was better enough to go back to work. This was a bad idea. And the more I worked, the worse I felt. On Thursday night, Crazy Dog barked all. night. long. And when I say barked all night long I am not exaggerating, he barked from 8pm until 5am, when I finally got up to remove his vocal cords. I'm not going to get into a whole big thing here about what a headcase Crazy Dog is. If one little things is out of place in the house. He will bark. And bark. and bark. and bark...until we find out what it is and remove it. He barked one night for three hours until I discovered that a sock was on the floor of the laundry room.
Anyways. I went to work Friday with 3 hours of sleep under my belt. It wasn't pretty. I almost had my hand removed while trying to adjust a machine, while it was still running. This goes back to the food-processor thing, sadly.
I caught myself in time and was able to remove my rapidly disappearing shirt-sleeve before my hand went bye-byes. The day lasted for an eternity and when I came home I ate dinner and slept. I fell asleep in my chair at around 7. Awoke in time to tape "Big-Boobied Girl Who Sees Dead People" for my wife and then dragged my ass up to bed. We have a lovely bed, btw.
I slept until 5am, when my wife got up with me and made me some chicken noodle soup. Yes she did. At 5am. She's awesome and you're jealous. I know. I went back to bed until like 8. Had lunch at noon and promptly went back to bed until dinner time. After which I well, went back to bed. Sunday was much better and today, well back to work. Mondays blow.