Monday, August 6, 2007

Ya' Know What Would Be Cool?...

The other night I was speaking with the Redman and we were discussing being bummed out and general ways we could lift our spirits. Aside form drugs of course. Because we all know drugs are bad....Well, most of them anyways, but I digress.
He suggested someone should make a 'Mental Douche'. That's right. I said it. A mental douche.
Ya' know...you could just jam it into your ear and squeeze. After a moment your mind is feeling at ease and light, and well..fresh. Your brain would make you feel like you were at the ocean, in the forest or, if you must, prancing through a field of wild flowers. It would come with all the senses. You could smell and feel the flowers. The grass between your toes and your mind would be completely at ease. No worries. All the 'mental dirt' of the day simply washed away. Replaced with feelings of euphoria.
A clever marketeer could also sell them in different varieties. You could get 'Ballgame', complete with the smell of hot dogs and fresh cut grass, and the sound of the ball hitting the bat and the roar of the crowd. They could make 'fishing expedition'. Complete with the scents of mountain air, pine trees and the roar of the river. For you girly men, they could make..I dunno...'Night at The Disco'. The sounds of polyester Leisure Suits rubbing together, the smells of fruity drinks and the pulsing occular punishment of Donna Summers.,,yikes..
And for the Mans man, one simply called 'TittyBar'. I don't think I have to go into details here.
I think this is a fanatstic marketing idea and trust me, once scientists can do anything with mind control, this item will be on the shelves. I just hope the Redman thinks to patent this.

No comments: