Thursday, February 5, 2009

Really Manny??

Pictured here we see Manny. Just Manny. He is one of those people who will be recognized with just a single name, ala Madonna, Renaldo, Gump, Judas, Leadbelly, Yaz, Tiffany, Ike, Whoopi, and of course, Yanni
Manny is a great hitter. No two ways about it the boy can rap the horsehide. He does however, have his moments. He is generally known for being moody, outspoken and generally, well.. a flake.
"Manny being Manny." as the saying goes.
Now MLB's biggest malcontent since who knows who has recently passed on a 25 million dollar, single-season contract. Seriously dude? 
I mean, I can't hit a curve ball, (whoa..bad example) throw a baseball from left field into the plate, or catch all that well to be perfectly honest. But honestly, how exactly does one say no to a 25 million dollar contract?
I mean you are just playing a game. A pretty easy-going affair, baseball. There's not alot of physical contact. Not like being crushed by a lineman in the NFL, or decked at center ice by Shanny. You basically stand out in the sun and catch a ball now and then. Maybe you have to try and hit the ball oh, maybe three times a game.
If you get a simple ahem, 'injury', you'll sit on the bench for two days for a bad-hair day to three months for a hangnail. Don't get me wrong, I like baseball and all but if we're gonna be honest with ourselves, you guys have it pretty darn easy.
So your rejection of this contract is baffling. Let's look at the numbers shall we? Maybe you can be persuaded to accept the Dodgers 'paltry' offer.
25 million dollars broken down over the course of 162 games comes out to about....
$154,320.98 per game if each game lasts, I dunno four hours, that means you will make...
$38,580.25  per hour even if it rains you'll still make....ummmm $154,320.98 
If you bat 4 times, you'll get $9645.06. Per plate appearance  Even if you strike out. Awesome, right! Almost ten grand for failing! Gotta love this game huh?
If you play a full week, say seven games, including a home at home double-header, you will make about...$1,080,246.80. A cool Mill. Dig it! Think about this. My wife and I when I was employed, would have had to work almost twenty-two years to make that, and that doesn't include paying for things like, food, electricity, health insurance...silly stuff.
I could go on about all the stuff you could buy with all that crazy freakin' loot, but I won't not in this entry anyways. 
True you are an awesome hitter, no doubting that at all. You were great for the Sox. But come on Manny...sign the contract and go play ball

1 comment:

Madam Z said...

Maybe he feels guilty about taking that much money. Maybe he wants management to reduce the price of the tickets, now that the fans have all been laid off of their minimum wage jobs.

What do you think? Am I on the right track?